Better best forgotten

One of the things that makes me think twice about settling down at my home-town is the phobia of my past. Memories haunt and I can positively guarantee that does happen to those of you whom your being is closely tied to your memories.

My childhood isn't at all that glamourous and I didn't even get to be around those popular kids. I used to be the weak kid where I was bullied and mentally tormented for being really fat. Schoolmates made fun of me because of my size and there were also few who took it to a whole new level - they spread rumours I was impregnated by a certain guy and was going to deliver soon. For all the rude and untrue remarks, I was called to the office several times and my parents were informed about it.

Yes, those were all rumours and yet, I was punished by my parents for telling lies. Back then, I hated myself because I couldn't even stand up for myself. All I could do was to cry myself to sleep. The memories haunt me for years even after leaving high school because I did not like the look at it as it always reminds me of how I got through those years.

However, there is this one special person who made life a little less miserable and difficult for me.

He was there to listen to me.

He was there to walk through my ups and downs.

He was there to give me supports.

He was there to make me smile.

In fact, he had been there all those times but unfortunately, I realized it 9 years too late!

I have spent every single day of my life wondering  about a lot of things.

What if I knew about how he felt towards me a little earlier.

What if I fell for him first.

What if both of us would listen to our hearts and held on.

What if we were not separated by distance.

There are just too many what-ifs and these what-ifs are the situations that will never again happen in our lives.

It breaks my heart whenever I think how ignorant I was in the past.

I guess this is the way how one is supposed to grown up - give and take, come and go, forgive and forget.

Although it is not something to mourn about or proud of, at least I know, this is where life has taken me. I learnt that nothing comes easily and if you really want to be with someone or if you want something, you have to put in effort to get it. Without effort, you're going nowhere.

Sad but true.

Now, I've gotta figure a way to escape this mental torture.

I have a pet called peeves

Once, a friend told me, "It seems to me that you are allergic to almost everything in the world."

The truth is, I am not really allergic to everything in the world - honest!

It's just sometimes, there are certain things that people do that really get onto your nerve. If you have been feeling so, don't worry - it's perfectly fine because each and everyone of us have our own pet peeves. Lemme share with you some of my pet peeves.

Let's start with beauty pet peeves.

1. Wearing false eyelashes without make-up.
Don't you think it feels like something is missing? Even when I did my eyelash extension last time, I made an effort to put on make-up just so it could enhance my overall appearance.

2. Strong eyeshadow colour with strong lip colour.
It is good to make a statement but it is terribly wrong if your make-up is trying to scream, "Hey, look at me! I'm an attention whore!"

3. Matte lipstick over chapped lips?!
Like seriously?! Eew... please, just use your lip balm or something!

4. Messy long hair =.="
I've gotta admit, I am a big fan of long hair. I guess you can judge this from looking at the length of my hair if you know me in person. Long hair is great but when your long hair is messy, it is NOT a pretty sight.

Geez... I think I don't have a lot of beauty pet peeves but when it comes to other pet peeves in life, I do believe I have quite a lot.

Now, let's look at other pet peeves of mine.

Obviously, I have made a list!

1. Re-dipping bitten foodstuff into sauces.

It is perfectly fine if you are not sharing the sauce with other people but if there is only one sauce on the sauce and everyone is sharing it, can you be a little more considerate? Nobody wants to eat your saliva! If you want to re-dip any food that you have already took a bite of, please get your personal sauce! It's for hygiene purpose!

2. Stirring the soup with used spoon.

The Chinese loves a good soup! I don't mind to have a big bowl of soup being placed on the dining table and to share with it with others but then again, please don't use your spoon to keep on stirring the soup. It will make me feel as if you're mixing your saliva into the soup! It's filthily dirty!

3. Please don't mind my dirty room!
Honestly, I do mind! I can very well tolerate a messy person but I cannot tolerate a dirty person. Imagine having to stand next to you and having to bear all those smelly stuffs in your room! Nobody like it!

4. Putting clean and dirty laundry next to each other.
Yes, you're too busy to put your dirty laundry in the washing machine but have you ever thought it's disgusting if people know you place your clean laundry next to your dirty ones?

5. Wearing the wrong bra for the outfit!
It completely disgusts me! If you're trying to wear a deep V top or something similar, please, just skip your bra and get a nipple tape or something! The sight of the bra is definitely NOT sexy at all!

6. Crowded places?!
Please count me out. As much as I love to hang out with people, I don't like having to smell another person's armpit. I would rather stay indoors.

I think there are more but right now, I can't think of any because obviously, I have something on my mind. Anyway, what are your pet peeves in life?